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Importance of Survival Skills

How to Survive an Alien Abduction

How to Survive an Alien Abduction


How to Survive an Alien Abduction. Intergalactic ambassadors of peace? More like sneaky space creeps. Live through your ordeal with these tips. You will need Mental focus Acting ability
Brawling skills Iron will A disease Reinforced undergarments and aluminum foil or hubcaps
(optional). Step 1. To resist a telepathic assault, focus your
mental activity against mind control by centering your thoughts on the word “no.” Use aluminum foil or hubcaps for lasting protection
against brain rays. Step 2. To resist a physical assault, act submissive
and intellectually inferior. When your captor gets close enough, surprise
them with your cunning and agility. Step 3. Refuse any demands to take them to your leader. The minute you do you’ve gone from useful
informant to cosmic snack. Step 4. Try to contaminate your captors by sneezing,
coughing, breathing, and being grody in their general direction. Aliens are notoriously susceptible to earthborn
diseases. Step 5. To fend off the dreaded probe and other so-called
scientific experiments, just slip on a sturdy pair of reinforced undergarments. For continuous protection, wear these everyday
under your regular clothing. Once the aliens realize they’re not getting
any “scientific data” from you, you’ll be released alive, and with your earthling dignity
intact. Or, they’ll have you as a snack. Did you know Physicist Stephen Hawking believes
aliens are almost certain to exist, and that human contact with them would be extremely
dangerous.

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